What does coercive control mean?

When people think of family and domestic violence, verbal and physical abuse usually come to mind. However, violence can take a number of different forms. It can affect anyone, and can have long-lasting effects on a person’s wellbeing.

Being aware of the different types of domestic violence can help you spot signs of unhealthy behaviour in your relationships.

Coercive control is a type of domestic violence where a perpetrator demonstrates a pattern of manipulating behaviour designed to intimidate, isolate and control a person.

The following are just a few examples of coercive control:

  • Isolation: The perpetrator cuts off or limits contact with family and friends so a supportive network is lost.
  • Denying freedom/autonomy: The perpetrator controls freedom of movement and independence. Some methods include not allowing the person to go to work or school, restricting access to transport, stalking or confiscating phones.
  • Gaslighting: The perpetrator twists a scenario to make themselves look right and forcing a person to question their own memory and apologise.
  • Financial control: The perpetrator withholds or limits access to money to restrict the ability to leave the relationship, making a person financially dependent on the perpetrator.
  • Monitoring: The perpetrator demands to know a person’s location and whom they are with, calling/texting them excessively, placing cameras/recording devices in their home or tracking movements with GPS software.
  • Body control: The perpetrator dictates their partner’s clothing, diet and physical presentation. Extreme cases may involve controlling sleep and medical care.
  • Jealousy/Possessiveness: The perpetrator might constantly accuse the partner of cheating on them, making them feel guilty about spending time away from the perpetrator or not allowing them to attend social events.

Help is available, even if you just want to ask about whether what you are experiencing is a problem. 1800 RESPECT is available 24/7 on 1800 737 732. You can also access a counsellor through the online chat function on their website www.1800respect.org.au

Open Arms – Veteran & Families Counselling offers a range of counselling and relationship programs for veterans and families. To discuss your options, you can call them on 1800 011 046.

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